Health Blog Men and Women Mental Health
28 April 2017 -
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One-third of men end up having a midlife crisis.
“Who is that man with the new car and matching earring?”,”Brand new engine?”, John, that’s the midlife crisis. It will pass”.
It’s often joked about, with a frustrating undertone, but is it true? So what is this period about? And how do men get a midlife crisis?A midlife crisis is partially determined by testosterone hormonal fluctuations, but the cause is often an imbalance in your life, especially in people who feel they are stuck in their work or relationship.
The midlife crisis
Life is divided into a number of phases: from baby to childhood to puberty, and suddenly you are thirty or forty and you have the idea that half of your life is on it.The age at which people experience a midlife crisis can vary. A midlife crisis can start between the age of 35 and 50.
Time to balance and ask yourself important questions.
– Am I happy both at home and at work?
– Have I achieved my goals?
– Who am I actually?
– Is this what I want in my life?
– Do I live the life that I had 10 years ago? Often the answer is no.
Midlife crisis in men through hormones?
While women get the menopause, men also suffer from hormonal developments, which manifest themselves between their 40th and 50th year: the so-called Andropause. During this time, less testosterone is created, making men less ‘manly’: they can get a little heavier, get less body hair, suffer from reduced libido and get erectile dysfunction.
Men who you feel are just not the same as they used to be
A man with a midlife crisis is a lot and often angry: on his partner, the children, his colleagues. He feels undervalued and not seen. Blunted, blown out, meaningless. The midlife crisis is like a form of depression, where a man often starts to do things differently. Some of the most well-known examples of this are a change of career which he moves away from reality and act totally different. He may start showing everyone: a new hobby (new motor!), start a new relationship (20 years younger?). Dr Derek Milne, a clinical psychologist, says: “If I was giving advice on how to cope, I’d suggest telling your GP you’re feeling depressed because depression makes up a significant portion of the midlife crisis.”
Dr Derek Milne, a clinical psychologist, says: “If I was giving advice on how to cope, I’d suggest telling your GP you’re feeling depressed because depression makes up a significant portion of the midlife crisis.”
How do you deal with a midlife crisis?
The midlife crisis in men can take about 2 to 10 years. That’s long, but does not have to be controlled all the time and the whole period is as fierce. It’s a period where you can learn a lot, what you need to pass through. It’s difficult, but communication is the keyword. Do not shut down, but recognise signals so you get what you’re up to. Share your feelings, stay positive. In this way, you use this “crisis” to look for things that are really important to you. Is this difficult? For many men though. Communicating about feelings is often a difficult task, especially in men. How it hits may surprise you: “A midlife ‘crisis’ may actually come as more of a subtle, low-key sense of dissatisfaction,” says Kathryn Betts Adams, Ph.D., an expert in gerontology, the study of ageing. It’s tied to regrets and reinvention: a sort of reevaluation of what you’ve done so far, mourning for the age you’ll never experience again, and a transition to what the new, older you will look like, Adams explains. The same 2014 study also found that happiness starts curving back up after your midlife. But how do you head off the crisis and avoid ever hitting rock bottom?
Kathryn Betts Adams an expert in Gerontology, studying the ageing says.”How it hits may surprise you: “A midlife ‘crisis’ may actually come as more of a subtle, low-key sense of dissatisfaction”. It’s tied to regrets and reinvention: a sort of reevaluation of what you’ve done so far, mourning for the age you’ll never experience again, and a transition to what the new, older you will look like, Kathryn advises. Research from the same 2014 study also found that happiness starts curving back up after your midlife. But how do you head off the crisis and avoid ever hitting rock bottom?
Find professional help and stay out of this midlife crisis.
How do you prevent a midlife crisis?
Prevention is better than cure. But in the case of a midlife crisis in men, it is a bother. What you can do is occasionally the balance sheet. Just an hour a year: look at yourself and wonder if you’re happy. Is my life right? Do I do what I like? Do things cost energy or generate energy? Is my work what I expect from it? Am I still happy with my partner? Do I want to learn something or do something special this year? Then I will fix it now and not wait for over 10 years. Having that “I have only” feeling should be avoided. If you bring this kind of reflection into your daily life, you will notice that by the time that the “real” crisis breaks out, you can master it a lot better. Success!
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Last updated on March 1, 2018.